By Trina Otero
I prayed and cried under the stars tonight. Ehh, no, not because I am sad. Remember how I wrote in an earlier post how amazingly awesome the view of the night sky is from the terrace? Ok, so that is one huge reason for my tears…the view is so overwhelmingly beautiful. It takes my breath away. Every Time. On top of that…I just felt like I needed to….shed my skin…or what is the best way to put this? It’s like wanting to be completely bare naked, right down to my soul where I can let everything melt away. The past, the doubts, the worries, the future, the everything! And just BE. I just wanted to melt everything away and just be. I felt the tears roll down the sides of my face as I expressed my gratitude for my life. I always like to give thanks — I still cannot believe I am here.
Have you ever been fully aware of the present moment you are in and felt extremely blessed, just overwhelmed [in a good way], because it is such a huge comparison to where you were a year or two ago? Where I am now is just…wow…just a HUGE difference. Just a few years ago I was at rock bottom — constantly faced with chaos. Those were the days when I experienced evil for the first time in my life. A darkness so vast and steep that I gave up hope. I gave up my faith. To look around and see where I am at now — mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically — is beyond words. My life right now may not be what others want for themselves, but for me I am more than 100% happy. I am beyond happy…I am joy-full. I am in bliss.
I openly shared intimate thoughts, desires, and goals with the radiant, distant stars…and as I did so I saw some amazing things. Here I will insert a disclaimer: No, I am not on acid or any other hallucinogen. 😉 So…..believe me if you dare! I saw a group of stars shine at me, with a sort of domino effect as if each star waited its turn to burst into a brighter form before returning to its former glow. This group of stars kinda look like an archer’s bow…or a sideways M. I’m not super savvy on my constellation names so I couldn’t tell you who they are…although I wish I could. Maybe it’s Cassiopeia? Or the “Sagittarius Teapot?” No clue, and for this I am so sorry.
I also saw what looked like several shooting stars. It had to be because A) they were very far, high up in the sky; and B) I have not seen any fireflies in this area and I have been here now for two weeks. The super cool thing about these sightings is that I saw the shooting stars right after saying certain things….One seemed so close to me, and it was so bright that I burst into laughter. Well, I actually laughed to myself every time I saw a shooting star tonight, but this one…wow….it was as if it was trying to catch my attention. I laughed so loud. It just tickled me! 🙂
After I saw this Star Show [mainly after I saw that super close shooting star] I asked for another shooting star for confirmation. I wanted just oooone more so that I knew I was not losing my sanity. Then I sang to the stars for awhile. I honestly lost track of time…I don’t know how long I was out there. But I sang them a song that came to me in a dream a few years ago. It’s about twin souls meeting. I sang it over and over…until I finally saw another shooting star. 🙂 And then I saw something else……
I’m not kidding when I say I saw some stars move. Okay…yeah, I sound loca now, but either they were stars moving…or crafts. And they weren’t planes. They were as bright as the stars, but so far away that I almost could not see them and sometimes I lost sight of them. But they moved very fast….it was pretty cool. If they were planes I’d rather fantasize that they weren’t, lol. But I honestly think they were not planes…couldn’t be. There were so many moving around in one particular area of the sky. [Actually, it was near that sideways M I mentioned earlier.]
So I laid under these magnificent stars tonight [well, actually morning…it’s well past midnight], wrapped up in a fuzzy blanket as tight as a burrito, for one or two hours perhaps, until the chilly air seeped through my skin down to my bones. My nose was like an ice cube. I saw a bat fly dangerously close to me and I exclaimed, “Oh hell no, it’s time to go inside! Goodnight!” And off I went to my bedroom. 😉
“Looking at you reminds me of how it feels to fall in love. It takes me back home. I hope tonight in my dreams I fly. I cannot wait to be up there with you again.” – T.O.